Had a doctor appointment today and on the way back home I decided I could stand stopping at Kroger as long as I remembered to grab a cart instead of a hand basket. (Muscle trying to spasm in my back and I was waiting on muscle relaxers to kick in.) This also meant walking into the grocery store without a physical list which can sometimes end in disaster.

I just needed Greek yogurt (part of my breakfast since I need to eat to take medicine) and to look at the meat department for dinner. Anything else I could remember was bonus. So, obviously, because it’s part of the long and involved subsets of Murphy’s Law – I found more stuff! Does anyone walk into the grocery store without a list and only plan to get the things they had on the mental list? No, you either forget something or find other stuff you forgot.

Anyway, I made my way around the grocery store. I remembered a few random things. Including the husband’s random craving for key lime pie. (Which I’ve never made….) I found a mix free of corn starch, natural flavors, and gluten and there’s a gluten free pie crust in the freezer at home so I went with it. In the meat department I called the husband/cook again to see which cut of meat he preferred as well as if he wanted a specific size. Not knowing if he a specific idea for dinner I wanted to check. Turns out he had no specific ideas or plans for dinner tonight and just wanted one of a specific cut of meat. Hung up with him, picked the chunk of plastic wrapped raw meat and continued on. (Not important later it turns out.)

Finished at self check out (no line!) and got to the car. Unlocked and opened the hatch first, leaving the cart there. Then I grabbed my purse from the kiddy section of the cart and went and unlocked the rest of the car and left my purse on the front passenger seat. (That will be important later.)

In the car, I looked for my phone to check notifications….. COULD NOT FIND MY PHONE. It usually goes in one spot in my purse, checked there first. No where else either. COULD NOT FIND MY PHONE. So, I remembered having the phone call in the meat department so I turned off the car (That was a mistake.), took a deep breath, and headed back to the meat department of the grocery store. No phone to be found back there. Waited to talk to the woman staffing the meat counter – no phone seen by her. From there I stopped at customer service and explained my predicament. I left my name and my husband’s cell phone number. Annoyed but…. you know. The thoughts of OHGODWHATIFSOMEONESTOLEMYPHONEWHICHHASMEDICALSTUFFONIT had only just started up.

Back to the car and I turn it on, realizing I should watch and see if my phone connects to the bluetooth. I had forgotten to check this before I walked back INTO the store. (Could have saved myself the walk.) Sure enough my phone connects, so I call the husband, explain my utter confusion and ask him to call me back after I turn off the car. I turn off the car. Can’t hear anything. I get out and go around to the passenger side, can’t see or hear anything.  Finally, because I’m freakin’ hot I turn the car back on and he’s called me back again…. SO, THE PHONE IS IN THE CAR????

I give up, and decide to leave Kroger. I’m out of the parking lot when the call disconnects and the phone is no longer showing in the car. That meant the car was now out of range of the phone. The phone was not in the car.

DID I SOMEHOW DROP THE PHONE ON THE PARKING LOT AND NOT NOTICE? Soooooo confused. Sooooo very confused. Did I mention confused? I swung into a left hand turn lane and made a U turn to get back to the store so I could go back to where I had parked. (Thankfully this was around noon. Thankfully this wasn’t Walmart.)

As I arrive back in the same parking spot I had left…. my phone is connecting to a call on the bluetooth. Husband is calling back. What the hell? Where is my damned phone? What is going on?

So, I explain to the husband what’s going on and how I need to turn off the car (less noise) and get out and walk around. I walk around in puzzlement for a minute or so. Look under the large truck parked two spaces over. Confirm I had remembered and parked beside the cart return I remembered being beside by looking for the cart I had used…. walk around the cart return I parked directly beside…. and there it was! My phone was just sitting there. Stuck against the plastic insert thing on the back of the kiddy seat part of the cart was my phone. It was literally pinned by one of the bars of the cart. I only managed to see it because I looked down as the phone started to ring. (That ringtone I gave my husband is useful for more than one thing I guess.) Also, black background, black phone, in the bright Texas afternoon sun.

So, I pick up my phone, answer it, and get back in the damn car! RELIEVED!  Now, reunited with my phone, I’m free to take the groceries and go the hell home! Hot, flustered, and terribly thirsty.

Moral of the story? Bluetooth on your car for your phone has more than one useful property. (And yes, I did thank the husband person for his help.)

Later I figured out my phone must have fallen out of my purse when I grabbed my purse when standing from the other end of the cart…. None of this would have happened if I’d been able to use a hand basket and have my purse on my shoulder.

Reminds me of the time I thought I’d left my kindle at the eye doctor (30 minute drive away from home) but really the cats had knocked behind a couch cushion.